People in this stage of the coming out process start to notice their attraction to same-sex people and really question what it means. Am I gay? Am I a lesbian? Am I transgendered? Am I bisexual? Within this stage there may be a denial of inner feelings as a person continues to see themselves as a member of the mainstream, heterosexual population. Some may consider their behaviors as ‘just experimenting’. Some people in this stage might keep emotional involvement separate from their sexual activity; others may choose to have deeply emotional relationships that are non- sexual.Step Two: Identity Comparison At this stage, a person may try to find an explanation for why they are having the feelings they are experiencing. "Maybe I am gay. Or maybe I’m bisexual.” Feelings of isolation & alienation are common in this stage. A person might wonder “Is this a phase?” “Am I only attracted to this one same sex person, or is this going to be a permanent trend?”Step Three: Identity Tolerance.In. No more. I want to take you away from this. We can be together finally but only if that is your wish. If not, I will walk away and never bother you again,’ I explained. There was crying on the other end of the phone. Her tears. I did not know the reason for them but I wished I was there right now to brush Marissa’s tears away. ‘I never stopped loving you either. All this time I wanted to let you know everything was okay between us. But I never had the chance. Now I do. If we could be together then that is what I truly want,’ Marissa said through her tears. Tears of joy. ‘I can come get you right now. If you want me to,’ I offered. ‘Yes. Please. I’ve never wanted anything more than to be with you,’ Marissa answered. She gave me her address and I was there as fast as possible while obeying legal speed limits. We were packing her things as well as Kaysan’s. My car’s trunk was going to be quite crowded. But it was necessary. The rest of their stuff would have to wait until tomorrow..
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